I dont know what to say about this bag.
FIRST: Don't scroll down! You will ruin the story.
WARNING!! This bag is R-Rated.
ALSO: I don't want to use any "suggestive" words as I don't want that kind of web traffic so these words will be substituted with words that rhyme with said "bad word".
For those that don't know the "Bye Bye Love Bag", it's Sara Lawson's (from Sew Sweetness) January bag for the Bag of the Month Club, and it's really a nice large cute bag and she did hers in some adorable strawberry print. I chose a lovely linen, by Anna Maria Horner. I have been hoarding this fabric for the "right" bag and knew/thought this was IT. Perhaps I should have thought a bit more.... Oh this bag has made me laugh, sigh, cry, and raise my eyebrows - more than once.
I am not going to write a huge story... but just get right into it. ahem.
Here is a photo of the pretty butterflies on the back of the bag. I decided to opt out of the zipper pocket because I wanted to show the full butterflies in all of their... glory. Nothing wrong with that, I think the back looks great! Nothing to see here, move on...
I made up the front and the back pieces of the bags with no problems. Although I skipped the recommended byAnnie's Soft and Stable in the pockets. With the added leather, all of the layers were too thick and I ended up hand stitching the pockets onto the front of the bag. It was slightly tedious.
Here is the pocket I finished first. What do you see?
My first thoughts:
DOOBS! (ryhming word) Oh my, there are big droopy orange "DOOBS" on my bag.
I send a quick text to Sheila and Carloyne that went something like this:
Me: There are doobs on my pocket.
Sheila: Where, I don't see them. Are you "corny" or something?
Me: NO! They are right there, big orange "doobs"!
Thoughts: Is there something wrong with me? Is my mind in the gutter?
Sheila: Your mind is in the gutter.
Me: NO!
Finally Carolyne: WTH is that?
Me: See, I told you!
But then I looked at it again. My mind WAS in the gutter. I saw more. Look at the pocket? There are knees and bums and "splotches" and, they look all stacked up. OMG there is a massive "Porgy" on my pocket!
Me: There is more, there is a porgy on my pocket.
Sheila: My daughter says there are nasty websites for people like you! lol!
Moving on. I kept going. Sheila reminded me the pocket flap would cover the doobs.
I did the other pocket, and it was not as bad, but still not "optimal". There is a suggestive bit, I suppose, but luckily it is hidden in the pleat. ?
I was wondering though, am I just seeing things now, because I am traumatized by the first pocket? Is this like an ink blot test, and if so, am I passing or failing? I added the magnetic snaps, that seemed to help distract the blatant parts a bit.
So I spent the evening hand stitching on these ink blot butterflies. I decided, I was going to finish this bag anyway! Yes, I was.
In the morning, I cut out the pocket flaps and tried to use the most abstract pieces of fabric as I could. I do so love the colours of this fabric, and I decided that my gutter mind was not going to wreck it for me.
Until I saw THIS:
Click to Enlarge. |
More messages:
So I just sent Sheila that picture only, no words to accompany and she replied:
Sheila: You must have been really perverted when you cut that fabric! lol
Me: There is a "weenis" on my bag.
Sheila: I couldn't help but notice that.
Thoughts: HA! My mind is not in the gutter.
So, end of story, I made up these photos and sent them to my husband and he says:
Husband: I don't see it!
Me: You don't see it? Are you kidding me?
Husband: Sorry babe I think you have a dirty mind!
Okay then, moving on.
Here is the completed bag, it's very serious and very proper, very proper indeed! I have used a lovely linen and complementing leather trim.
I am debuting one of my new metal bag labels today, isn't it perfectly lovely and proper! It says Handcrafted, Made in Canada and YES, I do have ones that say Handcrafted, Made in the USA, and they will be arriving next week. I have literally been waiting for them to get made for months.
Oh, why the crying? I broke my sewing machine sewing the bottom of this bag. My new sewing machine. I should have cut out the Soft and stable out of the seam, I really don't know what I was thinking. I will take it to get repaired on Friday and Mr. Repair Guy, will likely say "What did you do this time?"
This is my bag. These are my photos. There is nothing to see here, move on.